Last week, I got a rather excited phone call form a recruiter, a very good recruiter at that. He said I may have an opportunity for you at (leave blank) they wanted me to go over there this afternoon, my initial reaction was, it is the afternoon. Anyway never let the truth get the way of good story. So I go over to this agency armed with my laptop with presentation of all of my creative campaigns on it.

I arrived at (leave blank) it is huge reception decked out with furniture from a Conran store has a profound stench of wee…?! very polite girl on reception immediately says it doesn’t always smell of wee, it’s just worse today.

okay good start. I hang around reading the trades whilst the woman who is interviewing me (a copywriter) she spends 10 minutes laughing and flirting and chatting with some colleagues before she walks over to me. She doesn’t say “sorry kept you waiting while you watch me piss about with some others in my department of course none of it was important and now I have less time to spend with you” even though we could be sharing an office the three months

We wonder about the faceless, shapeless, meaningless area (leave blank) call a creative department. Finally we find a meeting room which is available with the precursor “because she didn’t book any rooms we may well get kicked out” ~ wow this is going really well I haven’t even to show my work yet.

We spent 15 minutes talking about her social live, where she drinks where she lives ect then she clocked my wedding ring and we start talking about work. She wants to talk about my showreel that she’d seen on-line “why did I do in this style; how do you do it; who did I get to do it” etc. I simply said “I edited it all myself on my laptop on Final Cut Pro not just that, the music that I cut my showreel to was also of my own doing again on my laptop”. She almost fell off the chair looked at me and said “f**king hell is there anything you don’t do”

I replied “body copy & headlines”

It was about the worst interview/meeting I have ever had: I was shocked and surprised and disappointed all in the same breath. It is a process that goes two ways. What part of an interview to somebody who is indoctrinated & interned by a large networked agency do they believe that was acceptable. The last time I had a meeting or interview that was this bad was when I was told that I was too experimental and not traditional enough and that the work I was doing would never really amount to anything. That agency closed its doors for years later. I regard what I did then to be quite commonplace and standard today.

So, we talked a bit about the project. She didn’t have a brief. She wasn’t sure exactly what the client wanted but she did know that they already had a delivery date because being part of the big network agency a media plan had already been devised and sold to the client. As much as I did my best to be professional and polite I really just wanted it all to be over so there is my 47 minutes inside a networked agency for you

8 minutes of that was pure bullshit
15 minutes were spent listening to her crap
9 minutes were spent talking about the project
10 minutes were spent waiting
5 minutes were spent trying to find a room

in the same week Lord Puttnam said:

“Those agencies that can see the future is exciting and make hirings that are not traditional. Those hanging on to the old business model – we both know who they are – need to know that it’s a model that’s all but bust. But it’s the one they know”

As with the banking industry, once upon a time nobody would have believed that a bank as old successful and well respected as Lehman brothers were could have collapsed.

and it did

therefore dear reader I predict the total and utter collapse and downfall of the agency known as (leave blank)

oh and as I left, there I was in the elevator with some other (leave blank) staffers, who did not think to keep they’re thoughts to themselves, started really slagging off (leave blank) agency, saying how much they hate the place. as a creative you just fit right in, like camouflage…

so the folk over at (leave blank) agency are all assholes then….

But, here I am with a post.

To tell you that ~

• I’m off on holiday

• I’ve been working way too hard

• When I get back: I will have a big anoucement to make

• Enjoy my http://gilesphelps.tumblr.com site till all resumes….?!

this was inspire by this

is Texas just this photogenic ~ or ~ am i right in thinking he’s a brilliant raw talent….?!

or should this history teacher ~ give up his day job….?!

Enjoy

leave your comments….

bellow

Cards of change is a collection of business cards and stories by people who have recently been laid off and ended up turning it into a positive experience

in some ways this has an echo with http://postsecret.blogspot.com/ ~ maybe….

cos being made redundant ~ is just a transition away from a badly run company to a better place ~ most of the time….

This could be one of the smartest music marketing “Stunts” for a while ~ hell I’m impressed: and as a regular readers know ~ that aint easy!

It simply ~ takes what is happening in council estates all up n down the country & owns it in an irreverent way: simple, bold & clever

Danger Mouse is [interview w/ Charlie Rose] the DJ who got quite a lot of attention a few years back for creating one of the very first mainstream mashups — mixing the Beatle’s The White Album with Jay-Z’s The Black Album to create the rather unique The Grey Album.   Now he’s set to get a wole lot more attention from the record labels. 
DJ Danger Mouse has another album that he’s been working on, in association with Mark Linkous (of Sparklehorse). Yet, due to ongoing legal troubles with EMI, he can’t actually release the music. So he’s come up with a rather creative solution. Found via Andrew Dubber, the news is that the next album will be released as album artwork with a blank recordable CD.

There is no music on it. Because if there were music on it, it would get him in more trouble with EMI. Yet, if you have that blank CD and all the artwork, you certainly could (not that they’re suggesting you do…) find that music elsewhere and burn it to the CD. The statement from Danger Mouse reads

“Danger Mouse’s new project Dark Night Of The Soul consists of an album length piece of music by Danger Mouse, Sparklehorse and a host of guest vocalists, along with a collection of original David Lynch photography inspired by and based on the music.
The photographs, which provide a visual narrative for the music, are compiled in a limited edition, hand numbered 100+ page book which will now come with a blank, recordable CD-R. All copies will be clearly labeled: ‘For Legal Reasons, enclosed CD-R contains no music. Use it as you will.’
Due to an ongoing dispute with EMI, Danger Mouse is unable to release the recorded music for Dark Night Of The Soul without fear of being sued by EMI.
Danger Mouse remains hugely proud of Dark Night Of The Soul and hopes that people lucky enough to hear the music, by whatever means, are as excited by it as he is.”

In some ways, this is reminiscent of what the band Green Day did many years ago, offering up blank CDs with artwork for fans who had downloaded the music from unauthorized sources. Yet, in this case, it’s even more interesting since there are no authorized sources at all for the music. It’ll be fun to see how EMI reacts.

Update: Meanwhile, the folks at NPR alert us to the fact that they’re hosting a streaming version of the album for anyone who wants to hear it.

Quotes stolen from: 9to5Mac

you know just how much I love both Star Wars & Star Trek, so this is a real winner from the get go ~ but more than that, it’s a nice idea taken forward into a real finished well polished piece of video, okay so it’s not as good as George Lucas ~ but then he’s never made me laugh coffee all over my mac…. take that Kurk!

off to get a new keyboard, thanks to mhorn ~ nice work!

love this & so do I kate Banazi !

Bryan Nash Gill

via Capree

first off > I fucking hate re versioning < good now i’ve said it

so when “Pizza Hut“ re version the above very brilliant Ad ~ it just breaks my heart, it really does

just chucking a pack shot and VO on a really great ad does not another really great Ad maketh…

you naff little fuckers

~ so just to make ya’ll feel loads better

here is almost a better Tabasco ATV Ad ~ from Belgium….?!

enjoy…

Virgin have been really putting out some big old TV ads recently, to both critical acclaim and some good figures too, most of all for “25 years“ that really did not need the ”and still red hot“

Virgin ~ are buying they’re way out of the recession, about the smartest thing a Brand can do, as there is overwhelming research that shows Brands that who continue to advertise during a recession end up on the other side in better times ~ the winners over they’re competitors, by a long shot.

~ so here we are…

and yet another big TV ad

I saw this for the first time last night, live and in my sitting room ~ the way ads must always be seen ~ not in a viewing theatre in Soho, with an introduction from the ECD. My wife, a very media savvy lady said a very astute thing over a large glass of wine: “there’s no fucking way, I’d get my self all dolled up in the toilet of a train ~ they are just too disgusting” this led to more wine, and so we flicked the AppleTV over to YouTube so we could see the ‘Booty Train’ again ~ more discussion and yet a few more thoughts raised

~ so she’s of to see here boyfriend, so she draws a heart shape on the window ~ after receiving a txt from her said boyfriend she then goes and checks out the farmer blokes…. “nice so she’s a slut too” said my wife…

only to share the moment with the “trolly dolly” ~ “Champaign spraying all over ~ god thats a sex cliché” said my wife…

then we both LOVE the other girls on the platform sing along ~ nice touch, make you as the viewer feel involved as at this point your most likely singing along in your head…

then the train, goes into the heart shaped tunnel at which point > “this has to have been done by men, it’s so fucking over the top with the whole cock thing, okay i get it she’s off for a dirty weekend ~ but trains can never be as sexy as airplanes…., said my wife…

~ at which point She nailed it

~ Trains are never as Sexy as Airplanes

~ and thats where the Ad, found it’s Achilles heal, as every idea / concept has one

~ it just took a 20 something woman with a media degree, a glass of wine & YouTube to find it’s Achilles heal

~ or did it, I feel very assured that we all make these discussion in our own heads all the time, as consumers with or without media degrees or glasses of wine for that matter….

~ So the moral of this here little rant????

> don’t underestimate the consumer, just cos as an Advertising wanker you think your not one ~ you so very much are my friend!